No Real Choice

Posted on Tue Sep 30th, 2025 @ 7:19pm by Captain Adrian Kellan & Lieutenant JG Aurora Winters
Edited on on Tue Sep 30th, 2025 @ 7:20pm

1,692 words; about a 8 minute read

Mission: Episode 1: Shadows of Diplomacy
Location: Starfleet Command , Counseling Offices
Timeline: 09/29/2404 @1300 hrs

“Adrian Kellar needs to vanish, Counselor.” Adrian said, a little defeated. He was not very thrilled about being recalled to active duty. He did not tell Aurora, when he showed up unannounced at her office in Starfleet Command.

“Captain it’s good to see you,” Aurora said “Why do you feel Adrian Keller needs to vanish? Come in and have a seat. It’s been a while since we’ve talked.”

“Retired Captain, and I am trying to keep it that way, Counselor.” Adrian started to say, as he walked in and took a seat in her office. She was right, he had been avoiding this place. Typically making her come out to him, when she had a moment. He always assumed since he was retired, she did not need to check in on him on a regular basis. It was Starfleet’s idea to assign him a counselor in his retirement. He heard what she had asked, and thought about it for a moment, before responding.

“I am thinking somewhere far far away, a nice remote planet in uncharted space, and far away from Starfleet.” Adrian suggested as he handed her a data pad. They were recall orders, Starfleet was activating him to service, and they wanted Aurora to approve his mental health stability. The Admiral said, knowing the good counselor would approve his request to re-activate Adrian.

Adrian felt that he was not ready, despite making good progress with Aurora and learning to adapt to the realization that there was nothing he could have done, in order to prevent the loss of life and his former first officer aboard the USS Renknown. He was also surprised that Starfleet was assigning him to another ship in the fleet. An older but recently upgraded Inquiry Class Battle Cruiser.

Aurora took the offered PADD and read it, leaning back in her seat as she studied him for several minutes. “I think you need to go back to active duty and come out of retirement. You're a good captain and having you vanish to some remote plant is not where you should be. I’d be more than happy to join you on whatever ship you're assigned to. Unless you can give me a good reason not to approve this request I’ll certify you fit for duty now. We’ve had many sessions over the past few years. I think it will do you good.”


“That was not the answer I was expecting from you.” Adrian started to say, he was hoping that she would agree with him. In his mind he wasn't sure how he could ever return to the command chair. And his mind he couldn't see why anyone would want him back in that chair especially after all the death and the lives lost over his illustrious career in Starfleet. “I was hoping you would say no and tell me I need to focus on my family and focus on getting better, what do you think getting back in that chair would help me. Next to my wife you're probably the only person who knows me well enough to make a proper determination of my abilities. I won't deny that. But I just don't see why you think I should. You know the Admiral said similar things too.”

“To be honest you're not to blame for what happened no one was. You need to get back in command and overcome the past and move forward. Take your wife and daughter with you. It will give you stability. As I said I’ll go with you to wherever ever command sends you and I’ll be there to help you overcome this. Good captains are hard to find and you're one of the best,” Aurora said “I’ll tell you what, try it for six months and if at the end of six months you feel you cannot handle it anymore I’ll recommend to command that the best thing for you is to retire. I think taking command, is just what you need.”

“Not the answer I was hoping for.” Adrian said, feeling a little defeated. He was hoping his therapist, his counselor would side with him. But instead he felt that she was throwing him to the wolves. Which was not very fair in his eyes.

“I’m sure it’s not the answer you wanted to hear. As I was told one you need to face your fears. Getting back in command is a way to help you heal and face things. I’ll be there to guide you all the way,” Aurora said.

“Who says I am not facing my fears? The issue is not the chair, it's the nightmares of watching my crew kill their first officer. I know they were controlled by the Borg, but I recall the events just as clearly as I did three years ago.”

“That captain is part of facing your fears. I’ve never dealt with the Borg. I’ve heard the horror stories about them and what they did. Anyone who was assimilated by them had a lot to overcome. I had a patient several years ago who had been assimilated and was freed from the Borg. It took him a few years to get over it. But he did and so will you. You’ll have a new crew, new first officer and a new ship. It’s a fresh start for you. Like I said try it for six months and at the end of six months you can’t handle it I’ll talk to command and recommend they let you retire,” Aurora said.

“Six months, huh.” Adrian said, with a big grin, he shook his head no. That would not be acceptable in his mind. “I don't think you are hearing me, Counselor.” Adrian pointed out to her, not liking how this was going. He knew he was being difficult, but for a good reason. He did not want to be in the chair or in starfleet at all.

“I’m hearing you just fine, Captain. II know you're not thrilled over this. I think it’s the best thing for you. Give it a chance, and see how it goes for you,” Aurora said. “You say you don’t want a command again but somehow I don’t think you really mean it.”

“Then you know something that I do not know, Counselor.” Adrian said, as a scene flashed into his mind, seeing his assimilated crew trying to kill him, and his senior staff. Luckily his wife and kids were planet side at the time. So they were safe from the event. But that also meant that Adrian was alone in his pain, which in part he was grateful for. He was glad that Eliana, Paislee and Lucas did not have to endure this type of pain.

Aurora thought for a few minutes then chose her next words carefully. “It's the fear of seeing what happened on your last command that's holding you back. Let me hypnotize you. I can get you to forget the Borg and assimilation of your crew and what happened.”

“That's very bold of you counselor, how does one forget the Borg?” Adrian insisted practically demanding an answer out of her. If she had some secret remedy to make him forget about the seriousness of the Borg threat, then he wants to know about it. “Because I've been trying for 3 years now, and I am no closer today than I was 3 years ago.”

“That captain is why I suggested to hypnotize you. I’ve used it in the past to help a couple other patients to forget a bad experience. I can do the same for you if you’ll let me. I can make you forget the horrors you saw when the Borg assimilated your crew and the crew trying to kill you. The Borg threat will always be there until a way is found to eliminate them. What I’m suggesting I have used it successfully and I’m sure I can help you too.” Aurora replied.

“No, it's our pain that makes us stronger to take that away from me will be prevent me from growing. I won't allow you to do that. I understand you're trying to motivate me but it sounds like I don't really have a choice here. Unfortunately my fate is in your hands, counselor. But if you force me to go back in before I'm ready you're going to be ultimately responsible for anything that may happen to me or by me I hope you're ready to accept that responsibility. That doesn't mean I won't be responsible for my own actions but I won't be going to the firing squad alone.” Adrian called out with a serious look on his face.

“I’ll stand with you should it come to that. I think you're ready even though you don’t. I am trying to motivate you. You're a good captain, one of the best. You won’t know if you're ready or not until you get back in the command chair. I believe in you and will be there for you,” Aurora assured him “Trust me.”

“Now I think you're trying to butter me up, I don't know what's worse being buttered up or being forced into a 6-month obligation. But seeing how I don't really have a choice in the matter I guess we're a team for now but you're coming with obviously and I expect you to do your duty to the best your abilities.” Adrian suggested a little defeated but trying to maintain a level of professionalism and a Stern tone to let her know that he wasn't really happy about this decision. After saying his goodbyes he then started head back towards home. No doubt he would have to put up with the excitement from Paislee. He knew Eliana would be more sympathetic to his needs but at the moment though he had to come to grass with the reality so he could be there for his daughter and his wife and they could be there for him.

 

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